I had a friend who I met through a mutual friend. The thing is, I never actually met him. We met because the mutual friend gave me his screen name. He told me I’d like talking to this guy (we’ll call him John) because he was funny. I was wary of talking to a stranger online and even more doubtful that I’d find him funny. However, over the period of a semester, we chatted more and more on AIM. He would randomly send me links to funny videos or start a conversation with a joke. I found him to be quite entertaining and enjoyed talking to him. After some time, I decided it was ok to meet in person, with our mutual friend. When we finally met up, it was extremely awkward. He got into my car and didn’t say much for the whole ride. If it weren’t for our mutual friend, the whole day would have been filled with awkward silence. I was pretty disappointed and wondered how someone could be so funny online, but boring in person. Perhaps he was intimidated by face to face interaction or he takes longer to warm up in person.
Accordingly to Walther’s Social Information Processing theory, this is normal. In the absence of nonverbal cues in online communication, such as facial expressions and tone, individuals can still form rich impressions of each other. Although I didn’t see or hear him, I was still able to deduct his meanings and sense sarcasm/humor in his online communication. He had no choice but to transfer this cues into the written channel through emoticons, capitalization, punctuation, etc. My impression of him took time, but it did develop slowly in CMC. Another theory also helps explain our relationship. Walther’s hyperpersonal theory suggests that because I knew very limited things about John, I over-attributed those things to his overall personality. Since I knew for sure he knew some witty jokes, I expected him to be a funny individual even in person. The developmental aspect of this theory agrees with the SIP theory that people adapt cues to CMC over time. Also, it explains that John probably used selective self-presentation to choose what he wanted me to think about him. Thus, I knew he was capable of humor, but not that he was socially awkward and silent in FTF. My expectations of him to say something funny online (since this was the grounds we were introduced on) follow behavioral confirmation. He knew there was pressure to be funny so he behaved accordingly.
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1 comment:
Hi Linda,
It's so interesting how someone can be outgoing and even charismatic online, but only due to the mediation involved. I have noticed that many of my friends are funnier online, and I think it is most likely due to the increase in cognitive resources provided by the medium. Just think: online, you can tell a joke that takes time to be understood and nothing will skip a beat because people often don't respond for a minute or so. Also, you are able to plan your witty responses and find entertaining links before hand so that you are prepared to be "funny." It sounds like "John" also had some behavioral confirmation from you online that just did not translate to FTF! I wonder if behavioral confirmation is usually limited to the CMC medium or if you can find it cross over if it is significant enough? Overall, a very succinct and thought out post! Good job!
-Brian
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