Assignment 5 Option 1: Mediated Communication in Relationships

Before the fateful day when all freshmen received Net IDs to create their facebook accounts, Cornell teased us by creating a Class of 2010 website. Although this site didn’t have all the features of facebook such as adding friends and writing on walls, it did allow each freshman to create a profile listing their major, interests, and other general information. Most importantly, the site allowed freshman to post one picture as their first assessment signal to the virtual Cornell community. I knew that this feature would open the floodgates for deception and superficial relationships. Still, I was not above the temptation to search profile pictures and judge some future classmates in a matter of minutes.

While browsing the site, I learned that John lived in the same town as many of my friends from summer camp. However, this was not the initial reason why I chose to message him. Wallace would have smiled at how easily I fell victim to the first principle of attraction online: physical appearance. It is human nature to desire interaction with people who we find physically attractive. Wallace argues that we are more likely to communicate with attractive people online because we associate physical attractiveness with flattering personality characteristics. We perceive attractive people as more sociable and more intelligent than others. Though this is clearly an illogical leap in a thought process, the limited cues online give more weight to the cues that you do provide. The one picture that John selected was a successfully executed assessment signal. By utilizing selective self-presentation, John portrayed himself in the most attractive light possible, and consequently, I initiated a dialogue.

Wallace’s principle of common ground states that we attracted to others with whom we share beliefs. Common ground certainly facilitated my online relationship with John. From his profile, I saw that we both like David Sedaris books and basketball. These shared interests were conducive to in-depth conversations. Our mutual friends created yet another connection between us. As we discovered more common ground, we disclosed more personal information and developed what was my first real online friendship.

Proximity is the last of Wallace’s online attraction factors that played a role in my relationship with John. Wallace states that a sense of familiarity is developed online through intersection frequency. He proposes that the more frequently two individuals encounter one another in an online medium, the more likely they are to form a favorable impression of one another. Because of the common ground and physical attraction, John and I talked on AIM almost every night. We would maximize our intersection frequency by going online around 10 PM since that time was convenient for both of us. This increased interaction enhanced the development of our relationship.

When John and I met face to face a few months later, our online relationship did not translate into instant friendship. He was not nearly as sociable as he represented online, nor was he as physically attractive. It amazes me how easily online relationships can form based on Wallace’s principles of attraction. Physical attractiveness, proximity, and common ground can greatly advance an online relationship , but have limited effects in a face to face relationship.

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