Tuesday, November 27, 2007

Stalkers!


We all do it regardless of how sketchy it is: yup you got it, stalking our classmates on Facebook. Freshman year I came across this guy on Facebook- he seemed like a nice, handsome, intelligent guy. Through his quotes, I knew this guy was pretty insightful. Furthermore, he was well-read. I decided to add him as a friend, and once he accepted, I was able to access his conversations with his friends. He seemed to have a lot of substance and seemed very down-to-earth.

After scrutinizing his profile, I messaged him asking him if he wanted to meet for some coffee. Contrary to what I thought, his response was full of enthusiasm. Phrases such as “Hi!” and “Will see you soon!” made me immediately like him. I was so happy he was just as psyched as I was about meeting him in person. That following Friday we met up at Stella’s for some coffee. He was nice and friendly, but he was not as enthusiastic as showcased by his messages.

In Ramirez & Wang’s paper “When On-line meets Off-line: An Expectancy Violation Theory Perspective on Modality Switching” one’s expectations of a person can be at changed by switching from a CMC environment to a FtF environment and this can also yield a more negative view of the person. This occurs in relationships that are mostly CMC mediated. Being that I met this guy on Facebook, and communicated with him via Facebook for approximately 2 weeks before having met him, I felt that my perception of him was more negative in FtF than in CMC because he seemed more lively in CMC.

My experience with leaving virtuality and entering the real world is congruous with the Hyperpersonal Model proposed by Walther (1997). I had a highly inflated view of this guy before I met him because of my complete reliance on a few cues that formed a highly exaggerated perception of the guy. Since I had only received a few “full of life” e-mails before actually meeting him, I assumed that this was demonstrative of his real-life personality. This is an example of the over-attribution process, one of the five parts to the Hyperpersonal Model. Selective self-presentation was shown when the guy chose to present himself in this very enthusiastic and happy manner. Behavioral confirmation was shown when I responded to the highly enthusiastic messages, with enthusiastic messages as well, which caused him to reciprocate more enthusiastic message, creating a constant rush of enthusiasm.

Unfortunately, I decided to keep a distance from this guy, as his super-introverted personality fTf was incongruous with my first perception of this guy on CMC.


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1 comment:

Lauren Burrick said...

Hi you!

Overall, great post! It was very neat story, and you accurately described your mixed-mode relationship with the Hyperpersonal Model. I think you are completely right in the fact that both selective self-presentation and the over-attribution of the limited cues you had of this guy affected your modality switch. I too found similar results to yours when I switched from CMC to FtF communication with my freshman year roommate; both pieces of Walther’s Hyperpersonal Model accurately explain why I went from thinking she was absolutely perfect roommate to an absolute nightmare.


Additionally, I am very proud of you for being so brave and messaging this guy! It is something I would never do, and I am curious as to whether or not you were hesitant about doing such. Furthermore, what was it about this guy that was so incongruous with your initial perception? Other than being introverted, I am curious as to why you two did not get along.